Odd moments

Dear Dan,

I don’t remember what happened and what I was thinking just before but I was turning onto Blue Course and thought, “I’ll have to call Dan and tell him.”

Then, of course, I remembered.

I have your phone. It was sent to me shortly after your suicide, At first I looked through your texts and your phonebook. I listened to the voicemails and dealt with the calls. Eventually your account was going to expire. I wanted to hear the only sound of your voice still available to me — your outgoing message. Sometimes I would call your phone just to hear the message.

“Hi. This is Dan. Sorry I can’t talk right now but if you leave your name,number and a brief message I will get back to you.”

I bought my Zen because it has a mic that I could record the message and keep it even after the Sprint account closed. I gave a copy to Scott, Harley, Tod and a couple of your other friends. Sometimes I still listen to it but I have your voice in my head — and your laughs. I can hear them clearly.

I just wish I could hear conversation from you. I miss the inane talks about movies, bar-b-que and wildlife. I also miss being able to call you for advice but it really is the little conversation I miss.

Love ya, bro! I miss you always.